Lord, Help My Unbelief

I was recently confronted with a question.  Is it okay to question or doubt my faith? My first assurance in the face of this question is this...God is bigger than all our doubts, questions and lack of faith.  God is big enough to address our doubts, lack of faith and questions; He is even faithful to us when we struggle to be faith-filled toward Him.  The Word tells us that our understanding is often unclear or in part, which may lead us to doubts and questions. 1 Corinthians 13:12 (KJV) reads: “For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.” Part of God’s answer or response to our doubt and questions is that although we don’t know or understand now, we will in the future.  It might be in our future on this earth, but if not now, ‘then’ in the next segment of our life—when we are with Him, face to face, we will understand. Today we must understand that He has asked us to walk by faith in this life, in the midst of questions, doubts, difficulties and seeming contradictions.  Faith is not so much believing in the face of ‘evidence’ to the contrary but rather trusting Him who know so much more than we do and is able to take care of us in the middle of our struggle over what seems to be sure evidence against our faith or hope.
What can we do in the face of our doubts and questions to enable us to trust God even when He does not answer us in the way we expect or hope? One way that I face my doubts is to rehearse times that God had helped me when I previously questioned Him or the circumstances of my life.  Scripture tells me that “we overcome by the Blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony” (Revelations 12:11). Jesus has already provided His blood, and we must proclaim that sacrifice in the face of the attack of doubt that is often brought to us by the enemy of our soul, Satan. When we begin to declare the Jesus’ love for us that motivated Him to make the ultimate sacrifice our minds and hearts are strengthened with love, gratitude and ultimately trust in His goodness toward us, His good plan in our lives and His power to carry us through our doubts. It is beneficial to speak these things out loud, because the Word also tells us that “Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.” There is power in the spoken Word, it is a sword in our mouths against the doubt. 
But equally important is the word of our testimony. The Greek word for testimony is also used for witness. We are witnessing of God’s faithfulness in our past circumstances, when we couldn’t take care of a situation ourselves, but He came through for us.  Maybe He didn’t solve it in a way that we wanted, but He still walked through it with us and brought us out the other side of it. I rehearse my past victories in Him to remind myself of His goodness and faithfulness, even in the dark. Hebrew speakers will tell you that when the scriptures use the word testimony it also means that God will do it again.  When we hear the testimonies of others, we can claim that God is “no respecter of persons” (Acts 10:34), so if He did it for someone else, He will do it for me too! Remind yourself that God is always good, and always has your best at heart, even when we can’t see how our circumstance will work out.  He is not the creator of bad events in our lives, but He will help us through, strengthen us in our weakness and often show up for us in miraculous ways when we trust Him.
I’m reminded of the story in Mark 9:14-29. A father had brought his son who had been afflicted from a young age by a spirit that was trying to destroy him. The father couldn’t control or solve the situation, and the disciples of Jesus could not cast out the spirit or heal the boy.  When Jesus arrived, the father begged Him to set the boy free. Christ said to the dad “all things are possible to them that believe,” and the father’s reply was “I do believe, help my unbelief” (vs.23-24). That was good enough for Jesus, the power to restore the child rested not in the father’s ability to believe but rather his trust in the One who had the power to do the work.  I have prayed this prayer more than once in my life when facing struggles that I could not solve and even in challenges so great I had trouble trusting the outcome to Jesus.  Doing the best I could, I prayed “Lord, help my unbelief, help my lack of trust.”  Then I began to remind Him, and myself, of the past circumstances that He had walked me through. That was enough for Him and that will always be enough from us if we come sincerely, honestly to Him with our struggles, doubts, fears and questions. As we pray with as much trust in Him as we can muster up, He will supply the rest and strengthen us through the dark times, our times of question and doubt.